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Other Writings > Letters to the Sydney Morning Herald — Politics et cetera

Sydney Morning Herald

Here are a few letters on a variety of causes…

Number 500…

So Morrison is sort of Donald Lite, but without the fizz or flavour?

If our Prime Minister is any example, the real test for an Australian is to be able to speak English while not saying anything.

April 21, 2017

My 450th was inspired by the brexit…

What are we calling this unpleasant phenomenon unleashed by the Brexit?

June 29, 2016

It is a truth universally acknowledged that any politician naming a political party after themselves must be in want of imagination.

A right wing bun fight inspired my 400th letter published…

I'm surprised an allegedly insightful commentator like Andrew Bolt doesn't realise that until Malcolm publically declares his 100% gold-plated support, loyalty, and commitment to the Prime Minister... we're stuck with Tony.

The 2014 budget of broken promises…

One presumes the only reason out most abundant resource is not mentioned in the budget is because no one in the government has ever heard of imagination.

A quip about Prime Minister Gillard knitting published on the day of her demise became aptly prophetic!

When it comes to knitting prime ministers, do we slip one, knit two together, or just cast off?

Given the people we'd really prefer as prime minister aren't in the poll question, shouldn't we refer to that particular statistic as ''least un-preferred'' prime minister?

February 19, 2013

Rather than transfer allegiance to Denmark, why don't we ask the Danish royal family to donate a sire so we can breed our own royals, like Norway did in 1905?

May 4, 2011

If judging political leaders by their faith alone is religious bigotry, does that mean making policy decisions on "moral issues" by faith alone is also religious bigotry?

December 8, 2009

Clearly in Rudd's Australia, all relationships are considered equal, but some are considered more equal than others.

3 August 2009

Responding to a call for bipartisanship in health...

Actually Dr Razvan (Letters, February 1t5), there are Labor gallstones and Coalition chest infections: the former resulting from an accumulation of old union bile and the latter from a failure to ever breath fresh air.

February 16, 2008

I can't help wondering it those failing the citizenship test do so because of an inability to explain the Australian values symbolised by a flag honoured by soldiers, waved at the cricket, worn to protest against religious schools, draped over xenophobic politicians, and made in China.

January 5, 2008

On Election 07's most insufferable cliché…

The term "working families" describes the ultimate passive wedge in Australian politics, the one that sounds inclusive but isn’t.   A quick run up my street demonstrates just how exclusive it is.  There’s single me, the working Grandma next door and the self funded retiree next to her.  All excluded.  On the other side are the lovely lesbians with a baby, who will remain excluded until the federal laws are fixed up.  Then there’s the professional couple, no kids, and the daughter caring for her aging mother...  all excluded by the working families wedge.  

It's time the poll-driven big parties stepped onto the streets of their electorates and discovered the diversity that is our strength, and started governing for "all Australians" that instead of just "working families".

3 September 2007

Following the PM's Snowy Mountains back-flip…

If all it takes to score a backflip is a letter to the Herald and 56 signatures, who’ll sign my demand for something really important like Aboriginal reconciliation, recognition of same-sex relationships, justice for refugees, and a reinvestment in social infrastructure through the funding of education and research.

June 3, 2006

In the interests of fairness, we should exploit these new industrial relations laws and sack the entire Parliament, then offer them their old jobs back at half salary with no super, no travel allowances, and no sitting breaks.

Better still, we could replace them with untrained teenagers, who might do a better job.

April 11, 2006

Sedition (at the Sydney Theatre, Sunday afternoon) was sold out, started 30 minutes late, and took more than three hours. But we loved it and yelled for more. Beware Prime Minister, sedition brought the house down, and if you try to make it a crime, it will bring down yours.

November 15, 2005

These anti-terrorism laws seem to be causing more paranoia than terrorism does but I fear writing a letter about them may be construed as sedition, so let's hope it won't be published.

October 17, 2005

It starts with a load of bull, it's ruminant, it produces tonnes of manure, it's being milked for all its worth and ends sour and cheesy. Shouldn't it be called The Latham Dairies?

September 16, 2005

Congratulations to the newly oppressed minority of "expensive private school users".

You now qualify for membership to the Australian League of Wedges, an elite and illustrious group with includes indigenous Australians, gays and lesbians, women, the unemployed, the mentally ill, art lovers, ABC watchers, academics, refugees, asylum seeks, health workers, environmentalists, civil servants, pig farmers, self-funded retirees and Margo Kingston.

League membership entitles you to be used as a political football by all parties, stereotyping by the media and vilification on talkback radio. Unfortunately you are no longer afforded "battler" status and forfeit your right to a fair go, but you'll soon discover it's a small price to pay when compared with the privilege of being democratically misrepresented by those who apparently know more about you than you can ever hope to understand yourself.

September 17, 2004

The first really big question of the election is will either of our illustrious future leaders remember to celebrate Wattle Day (gazetted for September 1) of will their minds be on matters more important than our trusted national symbol?

September 1, 2004

On Latham's alleged theft of an education policy…

Which is worse? Plagiarising a few education targets from a US President in the hope of a better future, or stealing a foreign policy and leading your country into war and uncertainty?

April 23, 2004

Celebrating the sesqui-Ted 150th letter published!

Why bother blowing up hotels? To truly terrorise the occidental infidels and strike feat into their hearts, simply threaten to marry a same-sex couple or ordain the wrong bishop.

August 8, 2003

Our Nicole wins the Oscar for best actress and can only make page 10? End this war before we lose all perspective.

March 26, 2003

If university staff can't strike because a university is an essential service, why are universities not funded accordingly ("Push for the non-striking academic", Herald, February 18)?

February 19, 2003

During a spate of corporate scandals and collapses…

Be alert, not alarmed… unless of course your a government watchdog, an accountant, a lawyer, a board member or a chief executive officer.

The real threat against our way of life is already within out borders.

January 15, 2003

Is the increase in border protecting spending to keep freedom-lovers out, or to stop those of us who seek a future in research, education or the arts from leaving?

May 16, 2002

Before embarking on his no doubt unparalleled anti-terrorist campaign, I hope President Bush will take a moment to remember the injustice done to the Guildford Four by a government in high dudgeon, armed with sweeping anti-terrorist powers.

September 15, 2001

I am delighted by the irony of Richard Court's claims that the anti-globalisation protests surrounding the World Economic Forum were un-Australian and just copy-cat protests imported from somewhere else: importing un-Australian things from somewhere else is a fundamental aspect of globalisation.

September 13, 2000

Expressing regret without saying sorry is the language of appeasement, deal-making, and political opportunism, not reconciliation.

The Prime Minister has a moral duty to make a proper and sincere apology for the wrongs done by the nation he was elected to govern. Anything less weakens us all.

August 27, 1999

On Sorry Day

If ignorance is bliss, then the letter writers despoiling Sorry Day (Herald, 27 May) must be very happy indeed.
Perhaps we should steal their land, poison and murder their children, blame them for it, then expect them to thank us for their new found liberation.

Alas, I suspect even that wouldn't put a dent in their heartless, complacent and conceited smiles.

May 29, 1998

Why don't we impose tough economic sanctions on all nuclear nations?

In one fell swoop, Australian industry will be boosted because everything won't be made in China, our children will no longer be immersed in American culture, we could cut the British corner off the flag, and we might even convince those big children, including India, that nuclear proliferation is the only thing from the 60s that is not hip, retro, and cool.

May 18, 1998

On the Stolen Generation Report…

Unable to read a recommendation or hear the cries of his fellow Australians, John Howard is fast becoming the Helen Keller of Australian politics. Would someone take his hand and spell it out before it becomes bloody?

May 30, 1997

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